We've talked about it a lot, went to couples therapy, read different books (Mating in Captivity, Come As You Are, and She Comes First) got it right out in the open and it just keeps coming down to her saying to me, "I don't want to have sex." We've tried different things like me sleeping downstairs in the guest room to give her more time to herself, I try to make sure the house is always neat and tidy, I try going weeks without even mentioning sex or trying to have sex and just be happy with her and loving and cuddle without the expectation of sex, and yet it still never happens. But I’m willing to give my marriage all I got before even thinking of anything else. It definitely hurts even tho my husband didn’t see it that way at the time. Clearly his sex drive is much higher and he's unable to support you the way you need, and there can't be a compromise between what you need and what he needs.



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We would still be having sex at least weekly, usually when we were waking up slowly in the morning. A lot of people are gonna comment saying sex is a need and blah blah blah but the reality is your healing & being allowed the space to heal, even if that means dry spells, is also an important need. These kids are growing up learning what they think sex is supposed to be from porn. She was 14 when they took her and there are almost 60 videos on a VERY popular porn site that I’m sure you know of. Bad idea. After many many relapses, I still caved in and watched porn or at least looked at hot model pics. We still had sex at least once or twice a week, and it was good, every now and then we'd have one of those mind blowing sessions like in the beginning before we moved in together, and also sometimes she'd "help" me (jerk me off) when I was really persistent and she wasn't feeling it, which I love deeply but I started to learn that she slowly started to resent me for needing to do that for me, she didn't like servicing me and she didn't feel like she had any space anymore to develop any desire or pleasure of her own.



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